So nervous, so unsure....but I did it.....with God's help

I started a Women's bible study this morning....let me give you a little background on how this all went down :o). About four weeks ago, after losing another child I was feeling frustrated and eager for direction! It was Sunday morning and Mark decided to stay home with Addison who was recovering from Strep Throat...Over coffee on this particular morning, I said to Mark~ "I just wish so BADLY that God would just clearly say "Amber this is your family you are not going to have anymore children, or Amber don't give up when the timing is right you will be blessed with another child"....basically I wanted God to speak to me on what to do...but I wanted those answers now. Anyway Hallie and I left for church...when I found my seat I sat down and opened my bulletin to an insert that read : WOMEN'S BIBLE STUDY Discerning God's Voice...how to recognize God speaking to you..morning classes available with child care!!! I started to cry...I knew I needed to sign up...but the sign ups passed and the first week went by...I kept making excuses why not to go...But honestly it would not leave my thoughts. I would be washing dishes or folding laundry and this voice in my head would say "Go to this Bible study, take two hours out of your week and go"..it kept popping in my head over and over again..so I called and they had room for me in a group. I left my house this morning not sure that I really wanted to do it but knew God wanted me there.I left there today overwhelmed with what I had learned about God and prayer...this is going to be quite a journey and I am so excited to share it with you. God needs to be first in my life above all else....so this is really the least I could do for him.